Frugal DINKs

The Epic is touted as “Vegas at Sea” and with the wide range of quality entertainment it certainly has a lot of live, not-your-usual cruise offerings. Quite a few of the entertainment options are “branded” in that they’re provided by well-kn0wn, professional entities, not cruise line staff.

Before the cruise, we made reservations to see the Blue Man Group, the Legends, and Second City Comedy Troupe (these were offered at no additional charge but advance reservations were recommended). We passed on the Cirque de Soleil show – it just didn’t interest any of us (nick, nora, Calvin, and Kate). Nick & nora have been to Second City in Chicago a few times, so that wasn’t going to be totally new to us.

The Blue Man Group was fantastic! Strangely, although the Blue Man Group performs year-round at Universal Studios theme park, none of us had ever been to see them. The onboard show lasted one-and-a-half hours, longer than we expected (we thought it would be an abbreviated show on the cruise). We arrived well in advance of the start (as directed) and took seats at a bar where we could enjoy our adult beverages and watch the show without being in the crush of the audience. The venue was larger than expected with plenty of seats. We had been told that we couldn’t bring outside beverages in to the show, but we hadn’t been told that the bar would close before the show began (uh oh); if we’d known that combined with the length of the show, we would have ordered more than one drink each. Some guests arrived late and to our disgust the staff accommodated them by moving couches and giving them fabulous seats (our thoughts: not following instructions shouldn’t be rewarded … ). There were displays near the stage and they scrolled “audience instructions” before the show started, we also noticed that guests in the center front rows were putting on ponchos (they were in the splash zone). So what happened during the show? There were the paint splash drums, one member of the BMG caught marshmallows in his mouth (nope, he didn’t spit them out! He just kept catching them! (Calvin and nora stopped counting at 15 marshmallows!), they selected a member of the audience to participate in a piece combining artwork and eating twinkles, there was a musical number involving lots of Cap’n Crunch cereal, and of course, they played the PVC pipe “organ”. At the end of the show there was a number with KLF and mountains of toilet paper… All in all, we were all glad that we did this. If for some reason they cruised on the Epic again (like a great deal becomes available), nora and nick would make sure that they arranged to see the BMG more than once!

The Legends were also very good – honestly, nora didn’t have high expectations of an “impersonator” show — but this was very professional and a load of fun. The first performer was Steven Tyler, while we’re familiar with Aerosmith’s music (always makes us think of Rock’n'Roller Coaster at Disney’s Hollywood Studios), we weren’t familiar with his performance style. Given the audience response, I’d say that he was dead on The second performer was Lady Gaga, we aren’t familiar with either her music or her stage presence… this was a lot of fun too. Very theatrical (which we did expect) and the impersonator had a extremely talented voice. The last performer was Elvis, finally music and stage presence we’re familiar with! We thought that he also did an excellent job (nora thought that the tempo was a bit off on a couple of pieces, but it could have been her sea-sickness pills affecting her ears!).

Each of those performances was in the Epic Theater, a really LARGE venue. The Second City Comedy Troupe performed in a much smaller space, the Headliners Comedy Club (Howl at the Moon also performs there, we didn’t see them as a group but nick stopped in one night & was a bit disgusted by the “begging for tips” during their performance). We went to one of the Second City early shows, more family friendly (so not as raunchy) and if we ever did this again, we’d want to make arrangements to see the last show as it’s more risqué. They performed improv skits that seemed more like what you’d see on “Whose Line is It Anyway?” than what we’ve seen at Second City in Chicago. Nick particularly liked the four square, four scene rotation piece… in this improv, each of four actors is given a persona and they are given four situations to stick to – the fifth performer tells them to stop and rotate left or right while picking up what was just performed… Nora’s favorite was the political debate charades – again the humor came from the assignment of particular personas and the quest to not only guess all of the particular points of the debate but to win the debate.

There were also some activities that didn’t require reservations that we enjoyed.

• Nora and Kate took a country line dancing class; it was fun and different, especially for Kate, don’t believe that she had ever done line dancing (country or otherwise).
• Nora and nick went to two “performer discussions” – one for Second City and one for Blue Man Group (more details in a later post).
• And the other entertainment activity of note… the Slam Allen Group! They performed most nights (5 of the 7 cruise nights) in the Scat Cats Lounge and were fantastic! They get rave reviews on Cruise Critic and some guests plan their trips specifically for cruises when Slam Allen will be performing. NICK – this is a four piece band reminiscent of a 60′s band (lead guitar, bass guitar, drums and organ – added an electronic piano too). I (nick) stopped in 4 nights! These performers were tight, tight, tight. I’d put them all at least 65 and maybe older? They sounded like they had played together for 50 years – that is how tight they were. The music was a mix of blues and soul. The soul songs really got the audience rocking. Many people would get up and dance. Each night I saw the same four ladies dancing and Slam started calling them the “Slamettes”. Now Slam is a very large man – think BB King sized. He sits to play all the music (I’m guessing due to his age and size). However he got so excited one night during an extended soul song that while playing he stood up, left the stage and started dancing with the “Slamettes”. Then BAM – he did a half split. I’m not talking close to the floor, I mean his crotch was on the floor. I’m not sure this is typical as two sound guys came running out to help him up and it was a struggle. But he never missed a lick on the guitar! If we ever do Epic again, I’ll see Slam Allen Band EVERY night – they were truly hot!

Most of the bars (and there were quite a few on the ship) had live entertainment in the afternoons and evenings… some of it was very good, some of it was just so-so. One problem with having so much live entertainment in the bars… it was very difficult to find a place to have a quiet drink. A few evenings, we met at Shaker’s Martini Bar before dinner and we were able to find a quieter place to sit and enjoy a drink together (we went around the corner to a more secluded area where there were tall banquets, quite nice).

There was one entertainment that nora and nick went to that was disappointing… the Motown Revue in the Manhattan Room. The Manhattan Room was one of the two “included” dining rooms on the ship, it was more upscale than Taste (we ate at Taste quite a few times, we didn’t eat at the Manhattan Room at all). This was a bit of a disaster in our estimation. All in all, it was more like watching an episode of “Glee.” Frankly, it was a bit cheesy. Some of the guests walked away before being seated. As we were sitting in the lobby talking to each other, we were saying that it was a shame that this was such a disappointment. Surely, NCL can afford better sound engineers… If dinner ends at 9:30, you don’t take reservations for 9:30 and later. Blue Man Group was SO MUCH MORE than we expected… Honestly, this was “stink, stank, stunk.” While we were sitting in the lobby, Rosie the manager came over to talk to us. She was open and honest and very eager to hear why we had decided to stay in the lobby and what specifically we were disappointed in… She explained that this was a new event and that they were still ironing out the kinks. She was very eager to do what she can to improve the experience for all guests, and we’re hopeful that our input is useful for her. We explained that the performance wasn’t clearly explained in the “Daily,” and explained…

1. The performance was scheduled to begin at 9:30 and dinner was scheduled until 9:30 on the “daily.”
2. They were still seating people after 9:30.
3. Guests who wanted to see the show were kept waiting in the lobby until after 9:30 and it was 9:45 before everyone was accommodated (by this point, we decided to just sit in the lobby – yes, we were disgusted with the whole situation & since the show was scheduled to end at 9:50 we didn’t see any reason to move from where we were parked).
4. The performers were not properly miked, the sound was horrid!
5. The performers were singing the songs, but there wasn’t ANY Motown sound (the performers were cruise line, not “branded” performers). The band didn’t have any Motown beat either.

Footnote: as a follow-up, Rosie sent a note to our stateroom saying “Thank You” and sent a large platter of chocolate covered strawberries. A very nice touch! When we would see her around the ship, she always stopped and smiled and asked if there was anything she could do for us.

In closing…

The branded entertainment was fantastic! And we include the Slam Allen Band in that because it’s obvious that they’re professionals in every since of the phrase. If we ever cruise on the Epic again, we’re going to rearrange our usual sleep patterns so that we can stay up later and take advantage of more of the later entertainment offerings!